I was suddenly called to write this stuff down for the whole world to read. I don’t know why. That little voice in your head that tells you to do stuff. Sometimes it’s your ‘higher power’, or ‘the devil on your shoulder’. Sometimes it’s a spirit of someone who was close to you or a voice from the past. Whatever you believe in, well that’s what told me to start this blog.

I had been doing a lot of ‘soul searching’ in the last few years. My first grandchild maybe. The reality that my parents were aging. Covid for sure and 3 months ago I turned 57 (60 is just down the road!). This ‘soul searching’ was in the form of off & own therapy (and plenty of self therapy) through the tragic times in my life. Also from my faith strengthening during these times but I never really made a life changes until January 2022. I should note that I have never been a believer in New Year’s Resolutions as I have always been the kind of person that expects ‘immediate results’. Patience is a virtue I have worked on my whole life and I considered it one of the ‘flaws’ in my character or personality I will talk about in future writings.

As I look back my thinking had changed somewhat and my actions had made small strides but nothing near to what 2022 had in store for me. It was the year I put all I’d learned and been marinating on into action! I’m absolutely no where near where I want to be or thought I’d be by mid-February but when I look back I see one main theme in my thinking that has dramatically changed. I no longer blame anything or anyone in my past or present for my failures and shortcomings. Wow! Its so enlightening to think, typing it and reading it is suddenly sooooo freeing! It was sort of depressing at first to dig within oneself and find what I called a few weeks ago ‘flaws’ that I always justified by some outside force influencing my lift. Then I suddenly started seeing these ‘flaws’ as ‘uniqueness’ and the depressed feelings have started to dissipate.

If you feel led to follow me on this journey, stay tuned and I’ll share more as I continue to go forward (and probably a step or two backward) down this NEW road!

Laurie (Lolly)